Mad cake son.

Moby is retarded.

So Moby is feeling guilty for living in probably the most beautiful residences I have ever seen in NYC. So he has decided to sell it. Here's his message to his bros:

"hi, as some of you might know, 2 years ago i bought an apartment on central park west at 90th. it still stands as the most interesting and unique apartment i've ever seen in new york city, but i've decided to move back downtown and am now going to put the apartment back on the market."



This place is off the hook. The only way you could have better views is from a plane. What? Is the place haunted or something? Dead cat in the walls? Ancient Indian burial ground? Not close enough to a Vegan restaurant? All of that shit can be handled. Come on.

Take the time and click around.



Note to self- Work on soulful pseudo techno production skills and get a good commercial agent.

$300 Chicken Wings. Initial estimate low.

So a few months back I posted about a $300 plate of chicken wings. This was caused by mine and Yo's rush to the deep fried and hot sauce soaked nuggets of goodness of Atomic Wings on 39th and 9th in Manhattan. In our rush, we parked in a commercial loading zone. Not a good idea. Here are the numbers:

Towing and Impound Charge: $185
Parking Fine: $140
Quarters placed in Meter thinking we'd just scored the best spot on the block: $2.25
Chicken Wings: $28.42

TOTAL COST OF BIRTHDAY WING FEST: $355.67

So my initial estimates were low. After a couple of hours on Pier 66 and a detailed tour of the NYC impound yard, we were out of there. Happy Birthday Dan!


The Hell's Kitchen Flea Market we spent some time at. All the while not knowing our car was being carted off like roadkill, possibly at this very moment.


The swift hand of justice has Lee Press-On™ Nails. "Oh, it's your birthday!" No shit lady.



Yo keeping it positive in the lockup. This place was like walking onto the set of Taxi. Except without Tony Danza and Latka. That would have been better.


We hit Tarrytown (aka Sleepy Hollow) later in the day. Pretty cool.


Probably the best city logo I have ever seen. Albeit somewhat morose. For those who can't make it out, homeboy is carrying his own head in his arms, but never fear, the Spring Social is still on.


"The fucking sign did'nt say anything about a commercial loading zone! This is some bullshit going on over here!"

SKILLS!

Oh, for real?

Thought I was hardcore. It's Weds, two days away from the iPHONE release and there's heads camped out in front of the 5th Ave store. Did I mention that it's like 95 degrees out with %100 humidity and it's suppsed to rain for the next couple days. F'n A. I love technology as much as Kip does but I can wait a little bit.

Weekly R$B Banger #28

R. Kells can pee on whoever he needs to if it helps him pump out these jams track after track.

Ines Brun Freestylin'

I've seen some shit but this is C-R-A-Z-E!

AIDS Awareness for the hood.

Getting my culture on.

Hit the MoMA in NYC Sunday. So much good stuff. Van Gogh's Starry Night, the Helvetica exhibit, an impressive Richard Serra sculpture exhibition, and an iMac (who knew) were the highlights. Definitely a good afternoon, even though I basically had to be IN the gay pride parade to get to the door. Worth the effort.

iPhone NYC

This guy....

Coney Island Mermaid Parade doser. So wasted. This river of humanity needed a life ring thrown in. Badly.

Weekly R&B Banger #27

L.H. had the makings to become something great but then slowly disappeared into anonimity. At least we were left a few classics like this. A guaranteed closer track.

Today Was a Good Day.

Rode my bike today after a short client stretch in the a.m. Grabbed a slice from Polito's- the dope local joint where you can order right from the street through a window & can cop freshly shaved Italian Ice's in the Summer. Went for a ride through the hood and stopped by the local "throw up" spot. There were some new pieces up and some people filming for some video.



Some peeps hate on fixed kits these days, but hey it's just a bike. It's like back when you were kids & wanted that craze BMX set-up but couldn't cash up. But now you all grow'ed up with a little change, so it's fun to piece your kit together. Not to mention you're getting some exercise. I don't know how many calories I'm burning during a four hour ride but it has to more than sitting there complaining about being tired all the time.



Plus being out in the mix you get to see a grip of shit, more so than you would walking around. While running you also get to cover as much area & really see what's going on, but only very few people I know still run outside. I remember being amazed last summer seeing the same runner we saw the previous day in Laguna only to show up in Newport the next morning @ small car show; a decent 20 mile distance with all hills. Not only was she breathtakingly beautiful, she f'n ran that whole distance twice in two days. She did, however, have the exact same outfit we saw her run in the evening prior. It didn't take away from how hot she was, but I swear after two days her gear must smell like a baloney sandwich.

It's back....

The most innuendo soaked pre dinner snack on the market is back with a vengeance. I think it means something different in Japan, just a hunch...

iCrowdcontrol

iAmageek

Apple TV

Yo and Eva got me an Apple TV for Father's Day. Definitely a great score. Everything on iTunes on your TV and the typical Apple 5 minute setup. Definitely won't hit the fever pitch of the iPod or iPhone, but definitely worth every penny. No more DVD's. You know, one less thing to take up space.

North Cackalacka

Weekly R&B Banger #26

Another gem from the 90s craze. Heard it on the radio this past weekend and still jammin' out.

To the left, to the left...

I don't get jealous very often but I have to admit when I saw Yolanda's seat on her recent trip to Shanghai I was floored. After getting on the plane, she took that all telling left hand turn and found this oasis. Lay flat bed, 17" flatscreen with your own movie library and a take home bag full of goodies. Compared to this Economy Plus looks like Auschwitz.

7-11 Does it again.

3 Musketeers Mint. OK, who has been reading my diary?

They're watching you.

You can hate but some of the biggest groups out there have boosted Hall and Oates loops. Their tracks blend with almost everything, definitely timeless. Caught some on Sirius the other day and it made me hit up my iPod archives for some of their classic tracks. These dudes were always on some other shit. Not a lot of glam, just two dudes with bad haircuts doing their damn thing.

PS- This video is so lo-fi it is amazing in and of itself. Watch for the hand claps.

JDM BIKE CRAZE

Fixed Kits have been in Japan for 40 years. It orginated as Velodrome Racing where people go to the stadiums and bet on the racing similar to horse racing. The cyclists undergo an arduous 10 month training period only before getting hand picked from various other disciplines.



So very much unlike the hipsters in Northern Brooklyn who transplant themselves from some wealthy suburb in Michigan only to dress down and attempt to ride and build some p.o.s. from some old 10 speed; the Japanese again show us how to do things properly even if it's how to ride a bike.



And just like the JDM craze for modding cars with super rare expensive imported parts which has completely possessed me; there is a Keirin Bike Culture ( keirinculture.com ) where you can fashion your bike with similar parts officially used for Japanese racing cycles; stamped by the Japanese Bicycle Promotional Institute (NJS).

So while you can cheap out and buy a $200 Craigslist beast or even a brand new $500 p.o.s. made by a US company- you can really really throw down and build a beauty with all NJS components. And your kit will def stand out as the frames are usually pearl colored gems from the 80s with dope gold parts. No HUFFY bs here.

Weekly R&B Banger #25

..Then he got caught up with this lady and found that glorious rock.




And the rest, they say is history.

Weekly R&B Banger #24

Bobby used to be brilliant...

Gimme a Fucking Break.

Trishelle is still a skank + that other slut made some babies and shit + all those dudes are fucking bitches.

Make something better for me to watch.

Zoom Zoom

Say Word

The best thing about the warm summer months is the diet from my normal indulgent self. My weekend binges are long gone since I'm usually sweating my ass off. However, I think the calories may be replaced for my affinity for ice cream. I may start the day light with some iced coffee but my lunch usually consists of some of that decadent frozen sugar steez. Chipwiches, King Cones, Choco Tacos I love it all.

My lactose intolerance gets thrown out the window since it might be all that I'll eat all day. Today was no different with a visit to Mr. Softee. Available 24 hours a day, the portable ice cream heaven is available on various corners of town. While I normally go for the Cherry Dip ala Dairy Queen, today I reached for the vanilla ice cream and choco sprinkles. Good Shit. Dinner will probably consist of a few Miller Lites. All together not too bad, still waaay under my daily caloric requirement, but whatevs... it's summer bitches.

I feel a HOOT comin' on..

Bacon Wave

I might make bacon more at home if I had one of these. There is probably some dude sipping margaritas on a beach somewhere from inventing this thing. Looks like a lot of bacon stacking to make it happen though. Like most things in life, you have to work hard to earn that extra goodness. Especially with microwave bacon. I think I read that somewhere once.

Now you are speaking my language.

Bubble Yum Slurpee? Thank you 7-11. Seriously, I could get strung out.

Fight the Power.

Why don't you have no pictures of no Muppets up on the walls?

Brief aside: Who has time to make this shit?

Ferrari FXX SUPER ENZO

I stumbled across this the other day. $3,980,000 gets you this car, a parking space at the Ferrari factory in Modena, driving lessons from Ferrari's Formula One team, and transport of your car to the best tracks in the world to wreck shop. This thing is going to make some rich dude happy for at least 5 minutes.

Make sure you click here to check out the madness. Take the time. Read the description. Retarded. Here's an excerpt:

"Every Client who signs up for the FXX project by purchasing one of the 20 cars being built, will actually be joining Team Ferrari, and will have his driving experiences at the wheel of this new car monitored directly by the Prancing Horse™ technicians and specialists. The FXX package also includes participation in a series of track events to be organised by Ferrari on various international-level circuits over the coming two years."

On another note, I thought the banner ad that popped up on the side of the page was pretty entertaining:

Kick out the JAMS.

Heard this on the radio the other day for "Old School @ Noon" and can't get it out of my head. Not that I really mind though. It's a lot better than Ms. "Unwritten".

Next Stop...ANAL.

Hulksicle

Spotted by Al somewhere in Manhattan. What are you gonna do when the creamy vanilla sandwiched between two chocolatey wafers comes to get you brotherrrr?